The continued safety, well-being, and success of our students, teachers, staff, and community has always been our top priority as we navigate the complex and evolving coronavirus crisis. To this end, we are updating our reopening plan to begin the school year in a fully online-learning model for all students which will continue through the last week of September. All students in grades 1-12 will begin on August 18, kindergarten students will begin on August 20.
La seguridad continúa, el bienestar, y el éxito de nuestros estudiantes, maestros, empleados, y la comunidad siempre ha sido nuestra prioridad más importante a manera que enfrentamos la compleja y evolucionante crisis del coronavirus. Con este fin, estamos actualizando nuestro plan de reapertura para comenzar este año escolar en un modelo de instrucción completamente en línea para estudiantes hasta finales de septiembre. Hemos actualizado el calendario para que todos los estudiantes en los grados 1-12 comiencen el 18 de agosto, los estudiantes de jardin de infantes comenzarán el 20 de agosto.
The Greatest Gift
Have you ever felt so angry that tears fill your eyes? That’s the state I found myself in as I listened to my own precious children say some hurtful things to me — to me, the woman who birthed them, loved them, fed them, schlepped them places! My mind and mouth were gearing up for an epic stream of threatening and guilt-producing words, and then I remembered the greatest gift I’d received from Love and Logic, that “anger and frustration feed misbehavior.” This gem, boiled down to its most basic construct, taught me that I could choose — actually decide — to stay calm. Love and Logic gave me written permission not to get mad.
It may sound almost foolish to some, and yet, I was stuck in a belief system that my own children (and others) were “making” me angry. It didn’t matter that I already had two college degrees and one of them was a Master’s in Counseling. I continued to lose my cool on a regular basis. How had I bought into the belief that others controlled my emotions? It started with modeling. Anger was a frequent visitor in my childhood home, and as my (amazing) older brother, Mark, said: “We weren’t taught that you could disagree without being disagreeable.” Another wise person once said, “What we experience we learn, what we learn we practice, what we practice we become.” (I have googled for the author of this quote to no avail.) We all know that practice can make permanent. As I grew into adulthood, I was stuck in the false narrative that “blow-ups” were just part of life, and I was not owning the fallout they caused because I continued to point fingers.
One of the most beautiful features of Love and Logic is its simplicity. It is not complicated, but it requires practice. As I practiced the art — yes, the art — of empathy and remaining calm during stressful events, I noticed something amazing. I was changing. I wasn’t changing into someone wimpy and permissive but, quite the contrary, I was becoming stronger, clearer, and warmer. I learned I could delay consequences, and come back later when I was calm. I could decide not to take things personally, take a deep breath, and even crack a genuine smile and say, “I love you too much to argue. What did I say?” I could even choose to sternly say, “I am feeling upset right now — I need to get myself together before I make any decisions.” Our kids are watching how we handle frustrations. Again, modeling.
It used to feel more natural to get angry, and yet I can attest to the fact that the more you use (and practice) the principles of Love and Logic, the less you have to “use” them — they just become part of who you are. Cooler heads prevail!
*Bonus: The next time you use a Q-TIP, remember this:
Quit Taking It Personally
Thanks for reading! Our goal is to help as many families as possible. If this is a benefit, forward it to a friend.
Kate Turner LPC