We continue to closely monitor wildfire activity around our community in partnership with the Boulder County Sheriff’s Office and the Boulder Office of Emergency Management. Firefighters have done an outstanding job closing the spread of the Cal-Wood and Lefthand Canyon Fires, and we are incredibly appreciative of their hard work and dedication to protecting our communities. We must remain vigilant and prepared for any changes to the fire’s activity, particularly with high winds forecasted for this afternoon through Thursday morning. Out of an abundance of caution, the Boulder County Sheriff’s Office has requested that we extend our closure of in-person learning at school in Lyons through the end of this week.
Beginning Monday, October 5, we will be implementing a hybrid in-person learning schedule for all students who are not currently enrolled in the LaunchED program. Click here to learn more. Comenzando el lunes 5 de octubre, estaremos implementando un programa de aprendizaje híbrido en persona para todos los estudiantes que no estén inscritos actualmente en el programa LaunchED. Haga clic aquí para saber más
The Greatest Gift
Have you ever felt so angry that tears fill your eyes? That’s the state I found myself in as I listened to my own precious children say some hurtful things to me — to me, the woman who birthed them, loved them, fed them, schlepped them places! My mind and mouth were gearing up for an epic stream of threatening and guilt-producing words, and then I remembered the greatest gift I’d received from Love and Logic, that “anger and frustration feed misbehavior.” This gem, boiled down to its most basic construct, taught me that I could choose — actually decide — to stay calm. Love and Logic gave me written permission not to get mad.
It may sound almost foolish to some, and yet, I was stuck in a belief system that my own children (and others) were “making” me angry. It didn’t matter that I already had two college degrees and one of them was a Master’s in Counseling. I continued to lose my cool on a regular basis. How had I bought into the belief that others controlled my emotions? It started with modeling. Anger was a frequent visitor in my childhood home, and as my (amazing) older brother, Mark, said: “We weren’t taught that you could disagree without being disagreeable.” Another wise person once said, “What we experience we learn, what we learn we practice, what we practice we become.” (I have googled for the author of this quote to no avail.) We all know that practice can make permanent. As I grew into adulthood, I was stuck in the false narrative that “blow-ups” were just part of life, and I was not owning the fallout they caused because I continued to point fingers.
One of the most beautiful features of Love and Logic is its simplicity. It is not complicated, but it requires practice. As I practiced the art — yes, the art — of empathy and remaining calm during stressful events, I noticed something amazing. I was changing. I wasn’t changing into someone wimpy and permissive but, quite the contrary, I was becoming stronger, clearer, and warmer. I learned I could delay consequences, and come back later when I was calm. I could decide not to take things personally, take a deep breath, and even crack a genuine smile and say, “I love you too much to argue. What did I say?” I could even choose to sternly say, “I am feeling upset right now — I need to get myself together before I make any decisions.” Our kids are watching how we handle frustrations. Again, modeling.
It used to feel more natural to get angry, and yet I can attest to the fact that the more you use (and practice) the principles of Love and Logic, the less you have to “use” them — they just become part of who you are. Cooler heads prevail!
*Bonus: The next time you use a Q-TIP, remember this:
Quit Taking It Personally
Thanks for reading! Our goal is to help as many families as possible. If this is a benefit, forward it to a friend.
Kate Turner LPC